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Archive for July 28th, 2008

We had a writer’s workshop over the weekend. Everybody was gloomy because of the weather so we thought that we’d do something fun to cheer them up. So we asked people to write about their first love affair. And if they hadn’t had one (we are talking about writers, not jocks), to write about crushes and unrequited loves.

That, and the fact that I’m getting a lot of feedback about the sex in Kkrishnaa’s Konfessions got me thinking about my first love affair.

I was a terribly model student in school. First in class. Good at sports. And get this, I got straight 100/100s in math in all term exams.

Since model students don’t exactly set guys’ aflame with desire, no one liked me romantically. Actually, correct that. No one liked me. In any which way. Period. Of course that didn’t stop me from having huge crushes (largely unreciprocated) on them.

It hurt. I mean there’s only so much rejection a person can take. But I consoled myself by saying it takes a brave guy to like a girl who is smarter and can run or swim faster than him. And that it didn’t have anything to do with the fact that I wore glasses and had zits on my face the size of grapes.

No one told me about toothpaste which is supposedly the best cure for zits. So I went through quite a few angst ridden years trying everything from homeopathy to antibiotics. Once I even scrubbed my face to within an inch of my skull.

Anyway, it happened during the course of my daily tennis game. There was this guy who (gasp!) liked me. My friends always went nudge-nudge-wink-wink whenever he appeared. I hadn’t seen this guy and though, outwardly I pretended I didn’t care, secretly I was thrilled to bits. I preened a little bit unobtrusively.

My friends teased me on and on about him. They called him Bakasur. I didn’t see why they called him Bakasur. I mean Bakasur was this demon, right?

Then I put on my glasses. Yikes! He was U-G-L-Y.

But he also liked me. The only guy to do so, so far. What was I going to do? Snub him and jeopardise all chances of future happiness? Or embrace him and, therefore, a chance at happily ever after?

It doesn’t take a genius to figure out what I did. But there was another problem. How was I going see him without making it obvious that I was desperate?

So we took to meeting at the only place deserted enough in the evenings – the ping pong room at the officers’ club. Of course, I wouldn’t let him touch me. So he expressed his affection for me the only way he could – by smashing ping pong balls into my body.

Sometimes we met in the library in the science section. Once in while he also treated me to a bottle of cola, signed under someone else’s name.

This went on for about six months. But then my dad was posted out and our little romance was nipped in the bud. This was my first love affair and I won’t tell you how old I was. Mostly because I am embarrassed about how old I actually was.

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